ehhhh

I have continued to walk daily and have not eaten any sugar or flour since May 5th. It's getting a little easier to motivate myself to walk every day, it kind of feels like my hobby now instead of a chore. I find that my body doesn't hurt as much and I'm getting more energy. It's not so bad. lol

sooo....

I talked to my parents and they seem really worried about me having surgery, which really makes me worry even more....even to the point of not doing it. I have had my doubt for the past couple of days but, I really want my life to change. The big question people are asking me is, "can't you do it on your own?" If I could,  think I would have by now. I mean yeah, I am working and this is just another tool but isn't it a BIG tool that could help me a lot? As of now, I'm still going through the steps to have surgery...and praying that if it's not meant to be there will be a road block that stops me from having surgery. I'm just so nervous, who ever said this is the "easy way out" has never been here before!! It's a lot of work, it's scary and then there is all the stuff that comes after surgery, like pain, learning what you can eat, and all the other things I haven't dealt with yet.